Feb 9
The Bedroom Is A Sanctuary
I’m a very messy person if you didn’t already know. My bedroom usually is a classic example of how messy I really am. It always has a mound of dirty laundry, random empty water bottles everywhere, Fiber One wrappers all over my desk & condoms filled with whip cream. My mom is a messy person too and she has definitely passed on that trait to me. I can live in the mess, but most people can’t, especially girls!
When I moved out on my own the only time I would clean my room was when I knew I had a girl coming over. I’d throw all my dirty laundry in my closet, lite scented candles, make my bed or at least try to make it. Little did the girls know before hand that only hours before they arrived my room was dirtier than a dead squirrel. I was really lazy doing the dishes too so my roommate when I would go out would put my dirty pots under my bed. I’d come home and be like “Damn, it fucking smells in here”. I’d scour my room for the smell until I’d find those trusty dirty pots under my bed. It’d smell like rotten spaghetti sauce.
This brings me to today, well yesterday anyway. Emily was watching Oprah (Goddamn you Oprah and your Ideas!!!) when Oprah was saying that in order for couples to have a good healthy relationship physically and mentally then their bedroom needs to be clean and in order aka a sanctuary. I took Emily’s advice and picked up all my dirty clothes. I called Em into the bedroom “Hey babe look the room is now a sanctuary!” ha ha…She’s like “NO..it isn’t” OK, so the room smells like a sweaty teenage boy, my shoes were all over the place, my desk was a mess & the bed wasn’t made. How am I supposed to know that just picking up my dirty laundry (No not you Sarah I’m talking actual dirty laundry) wouldn’t make the bedroom seem like a “Love Den”?
I continue my quest for bedroom love den status, although I know it’s a tough road ahead I race towards the challenge of making the bedroom a “Sanctuary”.
gso
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I’m proud of you! If the people in my house would just pick up their dirty laundry, I’d be a happy camper.
That is a great idea on the dirty pots though…what a brilliant soul…effing brilliant!
dirty: give the people in your household some reward system with a chart. if they pickup their clothes for the day they get a golden ticket. after collecting 10 golden tickets they get a free massage from me
Does Emily have a reward system for you?
dirty: Yes, for every pound I lose I get to flirt with girls from Ohio online for 3 minutes more
Pick me!
dirty: Duh!
Good choice
Oprah is evil. That is all.
WORMBRAIN: Oprah may be evil but she did inspire me to start eating better and to be a successful black woman from humble begginings.
gso
I’m a complete and total slob too! Never make the bed, laundry piles galore, and dishes…well, I’ve done some very interesting things to hide dirty dishes. Hidden them in coolers, put them outside in the backyard for an evening, loaded the oven with them. It probably took me more time to hide them then it would to have cleaned them, but my mind just doesn’t work that way.
BWHAHAHAHAhahahahaha
Xtina: doesn’t cleaning completely suck?!? Hiding dirt is so much more fun and unsucky!
dirty: you can’t laugh all by yourself
Cleaning sucks ass. I’m going to invent disposable pots so that doing dishes can be completely erradicated.
I’m so messy that when I actually do clean and put clothes in my dresser and closet, I can’t find them because they’re not in a pile on the floor.
Xtina: ha ha we specifically buy paper plates, bowls, plastic knives, forks and spoons so we dont have to clean enarly as much. Desposiable pots and pans would be incredible!!! oh my God I’d freaking love that!
Dude! Hire a housekeeper already. Maybe you could get yourself a nice nine year old on the black market who can live under your bed and come clean after you get up in the morning.
QofD: then i’d have to feed the kid! I’d rather hire a chick that’ll clean our place naked!
I love living by myself… My clean OCDness can come out with no one to judge me. Haha… And for the record I’m not that clean - I’m just neat. As in a neat-o person.
Erica: you’re a queerbait dude!
damn… well good luck with that… i’m not a very good house keeper either.. the rest of the house is in pretty good shape.. but my hrom is huge mess.. there seams to be an invisible line… my dirty clothes never seam to pass it and the Bg is happy with that
Julianne: I need a “Big Guy” in my life….I wanna feel secure and protected
you can get disposeable pans (aluminum cake pans) but pots are still a problem. Someday I will be a millionaire when I invent them and put dish soap out of business.
Also, you can line regular pans with foil to bake stuff, but pots–there’s just no getting around washing them. Bastards.
well you can’t have mine… get your own…
See you are subconsciously thinking you want to live with me. I live on Sanctuary Court
Xtina: if i were a millionaire i’d just hire a maid to do my dishes!
julianne: maybe i can rent him?
Todd: God does work in mysterious ways!
no renting either… i rented him out once and it took me week to fix him when he got back…
Julianne: I’d be very “good” to him
maybe you could make a claim that you;re anna nicole smith’s daughter’s father and become a millionaire? everyone else is doing it
Xtina: ha ha I don’t think I want my name wrapped up in that orgie of love!